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So…..I’ve had all winter off (and fall. my bad. seriously) and it’s given me a lot of time to think. I’ve already discussed your wardrobe necessities, but now I want to talk about your wardrobe faux pas. Let’s talk about the things we see all too often that never work. Let’s talk about the things you might not notice, but everyone else does.

 Panty Lines

Sometimes the nicest outfit can look like crap because of the V going across your tush. Invest in thongs. If you hate the way they feel, sorry, get used to it. Granny panties are for grandmas, and no one is looking at your grandmas ass anyhow. She is wearing Depends. It’s okay for her to have panty lines. But you, you don’t want those.

Shoes that don’t ‘go’

Ever see that girl who wears the same ugly, plain-Jane shoes for every occasion? Or worse yet, sneakers? Yeah, well…she is a rare breed, but she is out there. Work: black Mary Janes. Dinner: black Mary Janes. Happy hour: black Mary Janes. Et cetera, et cetera. It’s a sad life to be blind from the ankle down. I’ve actually heard someone say, “It doesn’t matter, no one is looking at your shoes anyway.” This is a real affliction that affects hundreds of women everyday. Shoes can make an outfit. You can wear a plain white t-shirt with blue jeans and the shoes will change the tone of the outfit completely. Flip-flops can make the look beachy, colorful shoes can make the look trendy, pumps can make the look sexy. The wrong shoes can distract from the sexiest dress, making the wearer look clueless or slightly disturbed. Never underestimate the power of your footwear.

Bra issues

Sometimes you want to show your strap it, most of the time, you just look sloppy. Buy convertible bras that can be worn multiple ways, and double-sided stylists tape to prevent your strap from showing. Or if you’re apart of “the committee”, you don’t need much support and can wear a strapless bra or even go without on some occasions. Some ladies choose to wear a sports bra with certain outfits, but beware, most sports bras don’t have individual cups and will give you uniboob. Take a good look at your outfit in the mirror with enough lighting to determine if your bra is visible through your shirt. Spillage isn’t sexy, just like a V going across your butt is a distraction, the same goes for your boobs. If your bra is cutting your boobs into a top and bottom half, the bra doesn’t fit. Get measured by a professional bra-fitter and try on different bra styles. Not every style will fit the same, even in the same size or from the same brand. A good fitting bra will lift and separate the girls, instantly making you look taller and slimmer. And if you are actually trying to show your bra off under your clothes (which I don’t recommend), let it be something lacey and pretty, but not vulgar.

Bad fit

There is no redeeming an ill-fitting piece of clothing. A bad fit will always make you look fat. Too long pants will look sloppy, and you’ll run the risk of stepping on your pants. Too short pants look as if you’re awaiting a flood, or borrowing someone else’s pants. Whether it’s too big, and it’s hanging loose around your body, or it’s too tight, and it’s creating folds in your 24 inch waist, a bad fit will ensure an undesirable look.

Too Much

Too much makeup. Too much animal print. Too much skin. Too much weave. Too tight. Too much spray tan. Too much t&a.  Whatever it is. Stop doing TOO MUCH. There is beauty in simplicity. There is sophistication in being a natural woman. No one is asking you to stop showering, to stop brushing your teeth, that’s not what natural beauty is all about, and those who think so are just plain wrong. Natural beauty is about embracing your God given features and playing them up. The grass always looks greener on the other side; ladies with straight hair want full, bouncy curls, and ladies with curly hair want bone straight strands. But hair always looks it’s very best when you keep it along the lines nature intended. Ever see a woman with caked on make-up going about her business? Don’t you feel bad for her? Don’t you wonder if she has a friend, or a family member who would just say, “STOP, you’re doing too damn much!” Ever see a girl inappropriately showing so much skin that you wonder if she’s being paid to be there? Don’t be this girl. Resist your inner Snooki.

There are many other looks that us girls should reject, let me know whats on your list.

The Mayan calendar predicts 2012 as the end of days; perhaps that was Karl Lagerfeld’s inspiration for the Chanel fall/winter 2011 ready-to-wear collection. Mr. Lagerfeld wants his ladies to be dressed to the nines for the apocalypse. The background is the volcanic, scorched earth, and the fashion is goth-chic. Lagerfeld’s collection is less ladies-who-lunch and more edgy fashionista. Chanel tweed suits paired with denim shows Lagerfeld keeping with the tradition of Chanel, but reinterpreting it for today.

Here are a few of my favorite looks.

Pictures courtesy of Chanel.com

Never underestimate the power of good accessories. Accessories can change the mood of an outfit from casual to funky, from preppy to urban, and so on. I’ve outlined the Top 10 Wardrobe Basics for Women, now let’s look at some essential accessories. Here’s another excuse to go shopping because you need them ALL!

• Black Pumps
You can wear these with a business suit, sexy jeans or nothing at all. Make sure they fit well and please be able to walk in them. Girls do a sad lunge-walk when their heels aren’t fitting properly. The results may be ankle, foot and back problems, so don’t be afraid to splurge on the right pair.

• Diamond Stud Earrings
Simple. Classy. Can be worn every day for years. I like these in white gold. Choose from the smallest size to obnoxiously huge bling.

• Silver Hoop Earrings
These come in many sizes and various prices. Every woman can find a size to fit her style, her face shape and her wallet.

• Ballet Flats
These shoes provide a nice relief from your heels. They experienced a huge resurgence a few years ago, but this style is classic and always chic.

• Black Leather Bag
Look for a good bag that can be carried everywhere. You want a bag that will make you look put-together for work, but will look equally good with jeans over the weekend.

• Sunglasses
Squinting leads to crows feet, wear sunglasses. Added bonus: eliminates the need for eye make-up. A pair of shades and lip-gloss is a made-up face!

• Watch
Sure you look at your iPhone when you want to know what time it is, but your wrist is naked during the daytime without a watch.

• Silk Scarf
A beautiful silk scarf can be worn various ways: on a purse, as a hair accessory, around your neck, as a belt, and any other way you want.

• French Purse
My favorite wallet for a woman is a French purse. This specific type of wallet will have compartments for cards, cash and coins. Many designers will make French purses to match their bags as well.

• Umbrella
Spring is on the way, and that means rain. Keep yourself and all of your accessories dry with this very necessary accessory.

If you’re anything like me, winter is your enemy. Dry skin, brittle hair, I don’t really see what there is to like about winter. This winter, most of the northern hemisphere was covered in snow. While sunny summer may be my favorite season, I always look forward to spring, as it provides a relief to the cruel winter cold. Spring is often thought of as a time of renewal, so it’s only fitting that we renew ourselves as well. Spring hasn’t sprung just yet, so we still have some time to get our wardrobe in order.

Every woman needs the basics: wardrobe essentials. These are the items that any good wardrobe is built around. These items are trend-proof, and work for many occasions. Buy quality items and treat them with care, because they’re in it for the long haul. These items include:

• White Dress Shirt
My favorite is the Brooks Brothers non-iron classic fit. Even when you dress it down, you’re still chic.

• Little Black Dress
Originally designed in the 1920’s by Coco Chanel. You decide how “little” you want your dress to be, but the idea is to have a dress versatile enough to take you from cocktail hour to the club, depending on the accessories.

• Trench Coat
Iconic. Will turn the average hood rat into Audrey Hepburn. Burberry is the standard. Buy in a classic khaki color.

• Black Dress Pants
Black is flattering on all figures and black goes with everything. Worn with a crease, they convey a chic, professional look.

• Pencil Skirt
Originally designed by Christian Dior in the late 1940’s, this skirt is sometimes referred to as an H-line skirt. Sexier than Dior’s A-line skirt, this works best with high heels.

• Day Dress
While the term “day dress” may be a bit dated, it provides a contrast to the Little Black Dress or an Evening Gown. The day dress can be worn to work and when accessorized appropriately, will take you into the evening as well. Diane von Fürstenberg’s wrap dress is a classic style that is flattering on all sizes.

• Cashmere Cardigan
Luxurious cashmere. This wool is soft and light yet provides the right amount of insulation to keep you cozy. Find one that complements the colors in your wardrobe and you can throw it on over anything. Keep it feminine though, you don’t want to wind up looking like Mr. Rogers, awesome as he was.

• Jeans
When it comes to jeans, find a dark wash with a straight leg. If you’re not wearing 7 For All Mankind, you’re losing. These jeans are experts at making an ass look fabulous.

•Black Blazer
You can dress this piece up or down. It may work with your A-Line skirt for work, or take your white t-shirt and jeans from sloppy to grown and sexy.

•Plain White T-shirt
It doesn’t get much more basic than this. Sure, you can grab a pack of these at your local drug store, but for a more put together look choose one in pima cotton. V-neck’s are more flattering on ladies with larger lady lumps.

These items are just the basics, once you’ve got these covered you can shift focus to unique pieces and accessories that express your individuality. Remember, don’t be afraid to splurge on these pieces because they’re the ones you’ll be coming back to, season after season, year after year.

My current obsession is Hadali’s Beauty Fine Oil for Body and Hair. I discovered this product while vacationing in the Caribbean this winter, and it caught my eye because I’ve never seen it in the States before. This oil is a Godsend, the answer to uncomfortable dry skin. It’s uses include bath oil, hair oil, and skin moisturizer. The coconut smell takes me back to the islands. It retails for €39  ($54) and you can find it at hadaliskincare.com.

When it comes to high fashion handbags, it doesn’t get any higher than Hermès. The Birkin bag in particular is the coveted status bag of all handbags; costing anywhere from $9,000 to $150,000 often times with waitlists of up to 6 years. Since we’ve already established that we cannot afford a Birkin bag, isn’t it just adorable that Thursday Friday has just released the Together Bag, a canvas tote with a Birkin bag print on it! And it’s $35! I think this is genius as fuck. The bag is fully lined along with inner pockets, to keep things like your iPhone and keys accessible. Just like the Birkin bag, these bags have a waitlist, so order now to have yours by spring. Since pink isn’t available, I will settle for red. I can’t wait to see if these become as popular as the “I am NOT a Plastic Bag” canvas totes by Anya Hindmarch.

Pssst…don’t tell PETA but, I seriously want a fur coat. I know, I know, fur is murder, but I’m fucking cold! For most of my life I was the type of person who would never entertain the idea of wearing fur. I thought it was a little tacky, a little obnoxious, even a little evil. It brought to mind visions of Alexis Carrington (one bad bitch) from Dynasty and other caricatures of rich ladies from the 80’s. I was the one to tell her friends about the terrible things they do to these poor little animals to get their fur. I was brought to tears watching a film where men hung a defenseless animal up and ripped the skin off of its body, while the animal was still alive. It’s a terrible thing to watch.  Thinking about it now still haunts me. But, it’s cold outside. This down coat isn’t doing a thing. There’s only so many layers a women can wear outside without getting a heat rash. Look, I don’t have the warm fuzziness that the Neanderthals did, so while 49 of the 50 states are covered in snow, a Russian sable would help me get through this modern ice age.

So I’m getting into this “Bitches on a Budget” book and trying to implement this sage advice into my life. I’m up to the section that discusses grooming and maintenance and was surprised to see a section about one of my obsessions, Phyto hair products. I have tried a slew of hair products in the past and believe that Phyto and Phytospecific are the best a girl can get. That being said, a girl has to be willing to work a little overtime in order to afford these luxuries. There’s nothing cheap about Phyto hair products, once only available in France. To receive the deluxe treatment, if you’re in NYC, I suggest a visit to Phyto Universe, where Phyto trained stylists will work with you in this “natural beauty oasis” (so not my own words, but yeah, I can see that). If you thought their products were expensive, wait until you see the prices on their treatment menu. I feel that if you’re going to make a permanent change to your hair, it’s worth the extra cash to have a professional do the job right, instead of botching the job yourself and then paying for a pro to fix the mess you’ve made. Last Saturday, I went in for my first treatment in about a year. Everyone at Phyto Universe is extremely knowledgeable, courteous and you will experience the best customer service of your life, seriously.  A few hours later I was completely relaxed, my hair was the shiniest it’s ever been and then I received the bill. The price of my service (and products purchased) didn’t surprise me, but I saw the letters “SMH” printed next to the price; I like to pretend that it’s the internet acronym “shaking my head” and the receipts way of letting me know it doesn’t approve. Still, I’m in love with the products, in love with the services, and us girls are allowed the occasional splurge.

I miss New York City. Living, working and learning to play in Brooklyn has made a trip to Manhattan a big to-do. I almost miss the days of schlepping to work daily during the Wall Street rush hour. Almost. In Manhattan, everything is a block away, or if you’re talking about Starbucks, every 10 yards. How I miss my daily mid-afternoon Starbucks trip, and my lunchtime trip to Borders, or a random moment of shopping. And just like the song says, “Everywhere you go, Duane Reade.” Everything a person can ever want, located all on one little island. So naturally after my day of training in Manhattan, I went for a little walk. Looking to do nothing in particular except check out the scenery. Just to see if it was the same as I’ve left it. After a little window-shopping, I found myself in the personal finance section of Barnes and Noble. Now, I’ve probably heard everything I need to know at my financial stage of the game from Suze Orman, but there’s nothing wrong with the constant search for knowledge. Or maybe I just wanted to buy a new book. After checking out a few titles, I grabbed a newer title I had never heard of, “Bitches on a Budget” by Rosalyn Hoffman. The cover has a picture of a red snakeskin coin purse under lock and the subtitle, “Sage advice for surviving tough times in style.” That’s EXACTLY what I want to read. With sections that read, “Thrifty Bitch”, “Pamper the Bitch” and “Be a Bitch, Bitch” I suspect this might be a little different than those Suze Orman books I’ve read. The books overall message is that in tough times, it is important to be frugal, but just as important to maintain a sense of yourself. Sometimes women are quick to do away with extra expenses, and as a result, their looks suffer. It’s expensive to be a woman, but there are ways to work within a budget and still maintain your looks. It is important to know where to trim the extra spending, and recognize that sometimes you have to spend the money on other things because the service is invaluable. You get what you pay for. Hopefully this book will remind me where I can curb my spending and fatten up my savings account, but still allow me my little indulgences that make me feel like the woman that I am. We work so hard every day if we don’t allow ourselves any pleasure, then we’re only living to work. Stress kills, and before it kills you, it makes you look like shit. That’s no way to go out. Hopefully this book will impart some of this sage advice and I’ll be back to looking like my Uptown self on my Downtown budget in no time.